Wifery – four crazies and a cop

travel review: the works- ohio center for history, arts, and technology

The Works: Ohio Center for History, Arts, and Technology is an amazing place (even better for free if you have a membership here or any other ASTC-accredited museum or science center). My kids went nuts over a plethora of hands-on interactive science-related activities on the first floor, beginning with a health and fitness exhibit with various fitness tests such as pull-ups (which I failed haha). Our little one then went off to the table with hundreds of magnetic blocks and other simple creative stations, while the older ones headed to exhibits with Dad that had more technology and buttons to push. The best part for a toddler or preschooler is the Tyke Lab in the back corner, complete with train table, dress-up area, puppet show stage, and even an ice cream parlor modeled after a Velvet Ice Cream Parlor, since their headquarters is in nearby Utica.

We then reconveined into the glass-blowing studio where we could watch Zach Layhew, the resident artist, work with paying customers to blow their own glass. Formal demonstrations are shown on certain days, as well as workshops (although I do need to mention they are not cheap). We then went to a small activity room while waiting for the planetarium show to begin, which was a nice quiet break where my husband and I could sit and watch as they played with various games, mini robots, and other STEM-related activities. In an effort to stay consistent in our parenting principles and not allow our children to leave until everything was cleaned up, we were unable to enter the planetarium show which we already had tickets for. When they say the show starts at 2 p.m., they mean it! Thankfully because of our membership, we did not pay for the tickets.

Upon wandering outside, we discovered an old train car (it is covered in case you go during inclement weather) that the boys loved! The train once belonged to the Jewett Car Company and has been restored and returned to its home town. Although I wasn’t able to read a whole lot of the history since the boys kept us moving, the company seemed to have played a huge role in the local economy at one point. We were able to board the train car, but the bell with the chain just in reach of at least three of the boys was a much bigger hit—the louder the better, of course.

After discovering the second building had a cool-looking restaurant, but not much for touring, we turned back around to check out the second floor of the main building, and I’m glad we did! The second floor is more of a museum than a science center like its counterpart beneath. As soon as we reached the top of the stairs, the boys went straight to the flight simulator and the Spirit of Columbus where they took turns flying a plane on a computer screen (we had a lot of crashes, going to need a lot of training) and sitting in the cockpit of a real, full-size plane once flown by Jerrie Mock, the first female to circle the globe.

We viewed a few more historical pieces, a lot of which was from the Pure Oil Company based out of Dayton, we found ourselves in an old-fashioned village. Different rooms showcased various professions and shops of the day. Our favorite was the game room where we stayed and played checkers, Space Force, and “chess” (this was more of the little one and me taking turns galloping horses across the board), and learned of Ohio’s history with the Etch-a-Sketch as well as Uno. It was a wonderful, cocooned family moment.

There were more exhibits involving local Native American tribes and prehistoric wildlife on the other side of the second floor, but we were past due on nap time and patience. Overall, it was a wonderful place for the kids and us. Everything besides the train car exhibit is stroller-friendly, although we did not need the stroller with our toddler. Next time we (as in I :)) plan to visit the Ye Old Mill where Velvet ice cream is made now that I know it is nearby. If you are in the area on a weekday between May 1st and October 31st you can even take a free public tour of the facility.

travel review: pymatuning pontoon-ing

I am no law enforcement officer so I’m not going to pretend like I actually know what it’s like to be out on the beat everyday. But I do see what it is like when an officer walks through the door at the end of his shift and hear what kinds of things he dealt with that day or night, which is why we have found it extremely gratifying to make time to get away pretty often, whether it be checking out an open house at an art center with the kids or hiking in the woods. Yes, I know there is a lot to be done at home, but the kids aren’t young forever and our emotional and mental health as well as our marriage needs refreshed.

One of our favorite now-annual trips is to rent a pontoon at Pymatuning Lake on the border of Ohio and Pennsylvania. This was our third year going with my parents (and this time one of my sisters), and is something we look forward to every year. It

is one of the few times we are all able to just sit and be still for hours on end, and just admire the creation around us. And somehow, as soon as we step on the boat, attitudes are wonderful and the kids don’t even argue. I don’t know what it is but it truly is an amazing experience!

We normally bring fishing poles, books, and maybe a few toys for the kids. And lots of snacks! This vast body of water allows us to just stop thinking about everything that has to get done and just be a family. If you or anyone in your family are feeling burnt out or just need some time away together, any type of boat trip is an amazing experience with so many benefits! I am highly considering moving to a house boat actually… everything seems to be so perfect on the lake!

If you have time afterwards, the Spillway is a wonderfully disgusting, yet simple place to go for a stroll, feed the carp, and maybe even stop for ice cream. It was only fifteen minutes from the livery and made for a peaceful ending to our day before our long drive home.

the will i aspire to

I will strive to drink at least eight glasses of water everyday so my body can remain clean and healthy.

I will do my best to eat a nutritious diet so I can never look back in regret while suffering with a disease that could have been prevented.

I will exercise regularly to keep my body active so I can live to the fullest and be available to serve in any capacity to which I am called.

I will read at least fifteen minutes from a good book every day so my mind can continue to be stretched and I can learn or be reminded of good principles to follow.

I will read a passage from my Bible every morning so I can know God’s will for my life a little better each day.

I will pray every morning for the wisdom and guidance needed for the day so as to know where God wants me in that moment and the best way to respond in any situation.

I will pray every night for protection, healing, and any other need for those around me and for myself so as to continue to remind myself prayer is a powerful tool and a way to bring us back to our Heavenly Maker.

I will hug my babies tight everyday so I will never regret not doing so, and if today be my last with them, that moment of love can be at the forefront of my memory.

I will love others with all I am so that it can never be said I didn’t care.

I will not hold tears back when others are mourning so as to allow healing to take place with them and within me.

I will serve everyone I can in any way I can with my family being first so as to hear “Well done thy good and faithful servant” in the end.

book review: tinman to ironman

Before my husband became an officer, I did not have a clue what law enforcement entailed. I just knew it was those men in blue (or black) who gave me multiple speeding, failure to control, and illegal right turn tickets. They were the men and women in the patrol car waiting to “bust” me going ten, okay twenty, over on the freeway. Thankfully I got my act together before my twenties and improved my driving record. Once my hubby entered the police world, I got a taste through his stories of what an officer would do on a regular basis and some of it came as a shocker, needless to say. But when he decided to go into law enforcement full-time, I am grateful to have listened and read material from Chris Swanson—motivational speaker, four-time Ironman finisher, and Undersheriff of Genesee County, Michigan.

In Chris Swanson’s first book, Tinman to Ironman: 26.2 Ways to Crush Your Failures and Transform Your Life Today!, he teaches 26.2 lessons to transform your life, specifically family, finances, faith, and fitness, exemplifying how strengthening those areas leak over to all areas, allowing for a successfully balanced life. Chris shares a little bit of his upbringing as a “tinman,” highlighting the moment he was cut from the baseball team in ninth grade despite being the “home-run king” in a previous environment. This devastating time of his young life caused him to give up on his physical life for over a decade. Like so many of us, Chris allowed one failure to effect the rest of his life until he decided to changed it.

He goes through lessons he has learned along the way, whether it be in athletics or in law enforcement. I believe it should be a requirement for not only anyone thinking about entering the police world, but also the spouse of significant other of those going through the academy. The stories not only prepare for the possibly gruesome road ahead and not only how to survive some of the moments to come, but how to thrive.

For me, I believe Chris’ material helped me to be a better law enforcement wife. I remember when my husband had his first DOA (dead on arrival). I’ll leave gruesome details for another time, but I was able to sit and listen to my husband tell me about what he saw and experienced without cringing. I believe the stories I read in Chris’ book helped to prepare me. I want to be someone he can talk to about anything, even it includes a gory image of an event he had to endure. I also believe that if more people, whether it be a “normal” member of the public or a law enforcement spouse, can understand a little more of what these heroes go through, we would have a lot more respect for them as public figures and as husbands and wives.

So if you are married or dating a LEO, related to one in some other way, or just want to know more about what it is like in their world and want to transform your life, Tinman to Ironman is an amazing read that will leave you with lessons you can take to the grave.

things we may or may not be doing in ten years on duty

I thought I would have a “Self-Care Saturday” evening after the kids were in bed since hubby was working nights, beginning with an awesome yoga session on my Nike Training Club app and then watching some cop videos on YouTube in an Epsom salt bath. I found an older vlog from Officer401 in which he mentioned a couple of things rookie cops tend to do differently than veteran cops. Now my husband went into law enforcement at age 29, which is older than the majority of rookie officers and may effect some habits and mindsets from the get-go, but I found it fun to think about some of the habits he and I have now, and what may or may not change in ten years.

Self-advertising… My husband and I are all for showing police support, but in today’s society I can’t help but be glad my husband does not walk around with his badge on his sleeve so to speak. I love being a law enforcement family, but we do not want to be a walking target. We’ll wear our police support shirts occasionally, but you will not find him gun and badge out when he’s not in uniform.
Listening to the police scanner app…. It sounds like often times rookies will do this off-duty, but my husband does not. I love listening to the scanner (only while he is at work) since I am a journalist by nature, and love hearing all the action. Most of all, I love hearing my husband’s voice, especially when he hasn’t been able to text me back for a few hours. I paid for this the other night though when I fell asleep with the scanner on and was shocked awake at 3 a.m., hearing my husband’s partner yelling “He’s running!” and then of course staying awake to hear what was going on, all the while dropping to my knees praying the suspect was unarmed.
Looking for trouble off-duty… My husband is really good at always being aware of his surroundings, and has dealt with things off-duty, but he doesn’t go looking for it. There have been multiple occasions, even prior to becoming a certified officer, where we called in potential drunk drivers (or high with kids in the back seat in one instance… I found this out after I was summoned to court as a witness only because I was the one who made the phone call while my husband was driving) and in multiple cases were correct, as well as suspicious vehicles. However, he is not one to nitpick on technicalities or to play “Johnny Law” and call out someone participating in illegal activities while off duty.
Posting positive police news with my husband’s picture in it… He is not one to toot his own horn, but I love to toot it for him. Because I am a very proud police wife, I love to post stuff about him. The downside is that I don’t know everyone’s intentions on social media or how they view things, even those I am “friends” with, and they don’t all need to know everything.
Not having thick skin… My husband is way better at this then me. Hopefully in ten years I’ll grow in this area. I remember we were at a little get together, I guess you could call it a party, and I overheard my husband chatting with a man he just met who was doing a little crap-talking about the police. My husband played it cool, non-chanlanty agreeing that some officers could be jerks (or something along those lines). In hindsight, it was funny, but in the moment, oh I wanted to say a few words!
Doughnut eating… I’m not sure if this is more of a rookie or a veteran stigma, but from what I am aware of, my husband does not eat doughnuts in uniform aside from maybe the occasional sweet dropped off at the station from an appreciative resident. Although, we both will have a doughnut at home every now and again 🙂

These are just a few of the quirks I have found to be common among rookie officers (and wives in my case) based on books I have read and videos I have watched written and produced by veterans. I guess we’ll have to see which of these he and I will still be doing or not doing after ten years on duty.

travel with kids: three beaches—cocoa, ormond, and daytona

Most families have a dream to embark on a trip to Disney. We wanted to get the whole experience, but my husband and I agreed we didn’t want to spend more than one day there. Beginning with Disney on our first full day in Florida, the boys didn’t mind going back and forth on the ferry in order to leave mid-day to relax. In fact, it ended up being of their favorite attractions. I highly recommend using the FastPass app if you don’t want to spend hours of your day in line. We knew we had to make the most of our minutes in the park.

The boys loved the ferry ride to and from the parking lot at Disney’s Magic Kingdom. Trying to cram as much as possible into one day, we actually left the park, took naps and went for a dip in the pool at the hotel, then returned two hours later to the get the full experience, fireworks included.

After a crazy day of Disney, we took the family to Cocoa Beach to recover. This was the kids’ and my first time at the ocean, which of course Lake Erie did not compare. Although this beach did not have life guards, it was very clean and not very crowded. The kids had an amazing time, which anyone who has ever taken their kids to the beach already knows how wonderful a place it is.

The next day we found an educational, historical outing at The Casements—the winter home of the late John D. Rockefeller. Affectionately known as “The Jewel of Ormond Beach,” the tour provided an insight to the social and everyday life of Rockefeller and the local area. The home is listed on the National Register of Historic Places and is designated as a Florida Heritage Center, teaching visitors about the “Birthplace of Speed” and culture back to the early 1900’s. Although our children wouldn’t consider this their favorite stop on our trip, we did not have one complaint of boredom, and the vast amount of pictures lining the walls and intricate structure kept them intrigued, as well as the enthusiasm of the tour guides. I would recommend leaving the stroller in the car, however, being there are stairs to climb with no elevators available from my knowledge, and limited space in certain rooms. Entry and guided tours were both free at the time of our visit.

Upon finding The Casements, we decided this would be a wonderful history lesson, elaborating on a historical figure with whom we were familiar as Clevelanders.

Traveling just fifteen minutes down the shoreline, we embarked to the infamous Daytona Beach, where we found the Museum of Arts and Science, a great place to take the kids (included with the ASTC passport program http://www.astc.org/passport/ if you are a member elsewhere). We began our trip to the museum in the planetarium, partly because learning about space fascinates us and partly because we wanted to relax for a bit. The first gallery explored was expounding on the history of racing that we had just learned about at the previous stop, as well as antique machines used by the Coca-Cola Bottling Company founded right in this city, which my mom really enjoyed, being a huge Coke fan.

From there, we enjoyed the more interactive galleries with various science stations and a play pizzeria for the younger ones. Here we learned facts such as “Americans eat 350 slices of pizza per second,” and other fun statistics. At the bottom of an almost hidden staircase was a music corner where the boys could jam away on various styles of drums and other percussion instruments.

Before leaving the area, we had to swing by the Daytona International Speedway, just to tell my dad—a huge NASCAR fan—we saw it in person. Tours run throughout the day, but can get pretty pricey for a large family unless you, too, are a die-hard fan. Also, as a plug for the local I-HOP, they had wonderful service and good food, and the waitress didn’t seem to mind us hogging the table for an extended period of time while we goofed around between bites.

Finally, we traveled to the infamous Daytona Beach and Pier. I would not personally recommend Daytona Beach as a wonderful place for children, after seeing a half naked man in his wheelchair waiting near the pier for loose change. I have nothing wrong with a man collecting change in his wheelchair, but when my husband points out his lack of clothing below the waistline aside from a small towel, then I reconsidered coming back with the kiddos. We did not swim at this beach, but we did catch the sunset from the pier. This was definitely worth the trip to this city. Roller-coasters and bungee-rides were nearby if you’re into that, but we were pretty spent and decided to wrap up our vacation without the thrills.

Beautiful sunset views from the Daytona Pier made the perfect ending to our final evening in Florida.

As you already know by now, we like adventure and we are frugal. Spending money on another night at the hotel made no sense to us when we would have to leave mid-sleep anyways, so we headed over to the airport to doze in the parking lot until four in the morning when we would head in to catch our flight. On a side note, we flew in and out of Orlando Sanford International Airport, cheaper and less busy, but still good service. Our flight was delayed after we had already boarded, but it made for a mini party once we were back off when we found out friends of ours were on the same flight with their little one. Often these unplanned moments make for the best memories. Overall, it was an amazing trip we and our children will look back upon with joy for the rest of our lives.

for once they cared

“For once, people actually gave two sh**s.” These are the words that came from my husband’s lips as he described what he felt passing hundreds of people in his patrol car among the procession. This was no parade with candy and clowns. This day was different. This was a sea of blue escorting the recently fallen officer to the auditorium where hundreds of law enforcement officers and family would gather to honor a hero who made the ultimate sacrifice.

Please understand my husband has the utmost respect for the public. He cares, otherwise he wouldn’t be an officer putting his life on the line to serve and protect every day. But with all the backlash and disrespect law enforcement receives in today’s society, it was amazing for him to see cars pull over on the overpass to pay their respects by silently watching the procession of law enforcement vehicles, led by the hurst and family. Employees from local retailers, passerby’s, and even the staff of a dentist office led by a gentleman in scrubs stopped their daily routines to come out and support the blood and blue family.

My four boys and I stood near a group of other police wives and their children to watch as the line of flashing lights drove by, displaying our thin blue line flags the kids made earlier in the day. The image will never leave my mind—a sea of flashing lights covering the highway coming over the hill, a wave of red and blue in utter silence. It just reminded me there is strength in numbers and the law enforcement community not only has numbers, but it truly is a brotherhood like no other. I was blessed to feel the love of a sisterhood as well among the families, after being invited to a play date with two wives I just met that day, as well as learning of the childcare network one of the police wives group set up so the wives of the local officers could attend the funeral. There is an amazing trust that cannot be broken by shots from an irate criminal or a liberal media.

This whole anti-police movement I really do believe is aimed at the wrong people. These officers being criticized so often for their attitudes towards suspects or racial profiling are really just doing their job. A lot of the training involves certain methods for a reason. They graduate police academy as “peace officers” and yet an angry suicidal pulls the trigger aimed at the very officer who was merely answering the call of a concerned estranged wife*. I believe the problem therein lies.

Often times, many of these activists speak out before having all the information, quickly assuming a badge represents a man or woman hungry for power and authority, quick to pull the trigger when his respect is at risk. Edmund Burke said, “Evil prevails when good men do nothing.” All of you good people out there who know the truth must speak out. Say hello and thank you to your local officers. Thank them for answering the armed robbery call and chasing down the culprit so he won’t terrorize your community again. Thank them for catching speeders so one more life can be spared, even if it means you may have to pay a fine once in a while for going ten over. Thank them for blocking traffic while trying to finish that crash investigation, because one day it may be you they are helping. Please teach your children that police officers are the good guys, even if they do carry a gun, because they are.

I think that’s what my husband meant—for once, even if for two seconds, people cared. People realized what these officers go through, maybe if just one day of their lives. People remembered who these officers really are. They are good men and women who feel a constant tug on their hearts to serve and protect in whatever way they are called. And in the wake of tragedy and mourning, people stopped to remember these men and women are truly servants and protectors, and really do make our world a safer place.

*R.I.P. Trooper Clark. Thank you for service. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/nicholas-clark-cops-new-york-state-trooper-shot-dead-responding-to-call-over-suicidal-man/

travel with kids: fort wayne

Finding places to go with small children can be a challenge, especially when you are trying to make fun memories with ages nine to two. The older ones of course want adventure or danger. The little ones want something hands-on. And of course, Mom wants educational. I’m not sure what Dad wants. He could just be along for the ride. Either way, we found a sweet spot just a few hours away in Fort Wayne, Indiana. This city even made it on Travelocity’s “20 Best U.S. Cities to Visit With Kids” list.

If you are in town, Sweetwater is the sweetest spot for traveling on a dime. It’s completely free! (Unless you intend on going home with a drum-set from the retail section in the front of the building.) You walk through the front doors into this humongous storefront that is a musical abyss. Since this was our first stop after our three-hour drive aside from food and bathroom breaks, we went straight to the free arcade to unwind. The boys started with a round of mini golf, the older two quickly transitioning to the virtual soccer and golf simulator nearby.

Moving on after a few other games, we searched for the infamous two-story slide which I somehow ended up on with the two-year-old. After checking out the observation deck over the massive warehouse, following conveyor belts all over to see if we could track a product all the way down to packaging, we wandered the storefront, checking out guitars, keyboards, soundboards, and other percussion, my oldest son’s favorite area being the drum studio.

The next day we journeyed to downtown Fort Wayne to Science Central (ASTC certified). This place was unique, being that it was the old power plant and still had the generators in the middle of the building and an observation deck where guests can see what it was like when the plant was alive and productive. The older two enjoyed a special electricity show about the Tesla coils. Being that their mom is obsessed with the electric Tesla Model S, seeing the original idea how it all came about was intriguing (and the boys enjoyed it too ha).

Be sure to check the website for Old Fort Wayne before heading into the city. Although it was cool seeing a recreation of the fort used during the French and Indian War, the volunteer staff who operate this historical site dress in costume to bring the 1700’s to life on certain days and for special events, and the buildings are open for viewing (https://oldfortwayne.org/).

We had planned to explore the botanical gardens before leaving the city, but by the time we found it, three of the kids had dozed off and we really did not want to loose that precious opportunity to gain some miles home in peace. Instead we decided to drive the hour and a half to Toledo and stop at Imagination Station since it was on the way home anyways, but that’s for another blog.

if you only knew

Earlier today as I sat down, I decided to do a quick scroll through Facebook and saw a picture of two girls in softball uniforms, at least one of them the daughter of a police officer, with some writing on the their arms that made me do a double take. Written on them were the last names of two local police officers who were shot and killed going to a 911 hang-up call just a few short months ago. They had written the names to honor those two families who would not be showering their fathers with hugs and gifts today for the first time. If they only knew that last year’s Father’s Day would be their last with their daddies…

My heart aches for those five children who lost their fathers and the two wives who lost their husbands on that day.

As I looked around at the decorations the boys stayed up late last night to hang, it made me treasure once again every moment we have together. The morbid thought did cross my mind as we ran streamer across the ceiling and blew up balloons that there was a chance my husband and their daddy would not be home in the morning to see all that they did.

Just the other day, while I was sitting around the table having dinner with my children and playing outside, my husband was in the middle of the woods for hours with four other officers looking for a man who fled after being pulled over for a simple traffic violation, presumed to be armed. I missed this call on the scanner and was not aware of this until the following morning, but it was one of those situations that make you ensure to cherish your marriage every single moment. If I only knew what situation my husband would be in that night…

The emotional toil of being an officer or being a loved one at home, waiting anxiously for that officer to walk through the door, could make a person crazy if they focus on what could go wrong. But instead we try to focus on what could go right, look at the difference our LEO has made and continues to make, and honor the fallen who made the ultimate sacrifice. Although really it’s their families that made the biggest sacrifice. If people only knew what an officer, a soldier, any first responder really, and their families go through on a daily basis…

Most importantly, we do our best to remember that no matter what happens, we’ll all be reunited someday in a place where there is no injury, no sickness, no criminals, and no death. Knowing that is best reassurance possible.

why fitness matters to me and should matter to you

As a mom of four, I drink more coffee than the “recommended allowance,” which means I’m hooked. Anything we can’t easily just give up, I would consider an addiction. Sometimes addiction can be good… like Orrin Woodward talks about being positively addicted to Christ, to the love of his wife, and other good things.

Now of course, even certain positive addictions can get out of hand. I remember Elizabeth George relaying a story in her book A Woman After God’s Own Heart about her husband walking in as she was preparing a wonderful meal for someone else as a ministry. When asked what they were having for dinner, the response was less than satisfactory. She was so busy serving others, she failed to serve her own family that day. Serving can feel good, and that feeling can become an addiction or an idol in our lives if we don’t keep it properly balanced with other priorities.

As far as fitness, I have seen moms who were “addicted” to fitness, or to looking good. I am no expert by any means in motherhood or in fitness, but I love both. Motherhood is a higher priority for me, but as a family, we all can make small sacrifices for each other. It all comes down to our motives. Sure, I want to look good especially for my husband, but I have a tendency to swell at compliments when someone notices the weight I’ve lost or the commitment to my exercise and nutrition program. And seeking those compliments can easily become an idol for me if I’m not constantly aware.

On a positive note, I believe being a “fit mom” sets an example for my family of truly treating my body as a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Having fitness goals also helps me apply 1 Corinthians 9:27 to my life: “I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” I know I rarely feel close to God after a midnight binge in the cupboard. Next time you feel guilty about taking time for yourself to exercise, remember the benefits for your husband, your children, and everyone else you serve, as well as your temple. Here’s to a happy, healthy life!