Blue Moose – Page 2 – four crazies and a cop

travel with kids: fort wayne

Finding places to go with small children can be a challenge, especially when you are trying to make fun memories with ages nine to two. The older ones of course want adventure or danger. The little ones want something hands-on. And of course, Mom wants educational. I’m not sure what Dad wants. He could just be along for the ride. Either way, we found a sweet spot just a few hours away in Fort Wayne, Indiana. This city even made it on Travelocity’s “20 Best U.S. Cities to Visit With Kids” list.

If you are in town, Sweetwater is the sweetest spot for traveling on a dime. It’s completely free! (Unless you intend on going home with a drum-set from the retail section in the front of the building.) You walk through the front doors into this humongous storefront that is a musical abyss. Since this was our first stop after our three-hour drive aside from food and bathroom breaks, we went straight to the free arcade to unwind. The boys started with a round of mini golf, the older two quickly transitioning to the virtual soccer and golf simulator nearby.

Moving on after a few other games, we searched for the infamous two-story slide which I somehow ended up on with the two-year-old. After checking out the observation deck over the massive warehouse, following conveyor belts all over to see if we could track a product all the way down to packaging, we wandered the storefront, checking out guitars, keyboards, soundboards, and other percussion, my oldest son’s favorite area being the drum studio.

The next day we journeyed to downtown Fort Wayne to Science Central (ASTC certified). This place was unique, being that it was the old power plant and still had the generators in the middle of the building and an observation deck where guests can see what it was like when the plant was alive and productive. The older two enjoyed a special electricity show about the Tesla coils. Being that their mom is obsessed with the electric Tesla Model S, seeing the original idea how it all came about was intriguing (and the boys enjoyed it too ha).

Be sure to check the website for Old Fort Wayne before heading into the city. Although it was cool seeing a recreation of the fort used during the French and Indian War, the volunteer staff who operate this historical site dress in costume to bring the 1700’s to life on certain days and for special events, and the buildings are open for viewing (https://oldfortwayne.org/).

We had planned to explore the botanical gardens before leaving the city, but by the time we found it, three of the kids had dozed off and we really did not want to loose that precious opportunity to gain some miles home in peace. Instead we decided to drive the hour and a half to Toledo and stop at Imagination Station since it was on the way home anyways, but that’s for another blog.

travel with kids: pittsburgh

Looking to take a trip as a law enforcement family on a dime with little time and little kids? A membership to any of the local Association of Science Technology Centers will allow just that, guaranteed fun! (http://www.astc.org/passport/) I am blessed to receive a membership every year to the Cleveland Museum of Natural History as a birthday gift, which means free or discounted admission to multiple science centers and children’s museums in almost every state, so long as it is outside of a ninety-mile radius. Our children have become expert travelers for day trips and if it is more than three hours a way, we’ll stay a night or two.

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania has been one of our favorite places and the city that started our travel addiction. Duquesne Incline, Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, and Carnegie Science Center are all must do’s, although if we would have known exactly what the incline was we may not have done that one from first glance! I’m glad we purchased the tickets ahead of time. (h ttp://duquesneincline.org/)

It was an amazing experience riding a century-old cable car up the side of Mount Washington and then not only wandering the museum, offering an experience that will take you back in time when the incline was a primary mode of transportation, but getting to witness the view! Be advised, the ride up is pretty rickety, but we happened to catch one of the tour guides on the way down who ensured us our safety and explained the extensive tests the cars and cables undergo.The kids had no fear, wondering why Mom and Dad were rushing them off at the top (haha). The view from the observation deck alone was worth the udder horror on the ride up, as it overlooks the entire city.

The Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh is an all-time favorite for our kids. All the basics of a children’s museum are covered… the painting area, light bar play, mechanics. But what makes this place so amazing is the full-floor water play layered with a drainage floor for maximum fun. Fountains, pipes, boat racing, all kinds of activities for the kids to enjoy and lots of sitting areas for the caretakers to relax. We planned a trip back centering around this water area! Pool attire is recommended, which we will be bringing next time. Dryers and changing areas are available as well.

Once we discovered that the children’s museum and the Carnegie Science Center are ASTC-certified, we decided to go back to Pittsburgh for a day, but ended up spending so much time in the science center we didn’t make it back to the children’s museum! The cornerstone to the science center was the tour of the USS Requin Submarine complete with a full-size torpedo to greet you as you enter the sub. The history comes to life as you squeeze through the hallway peering into each room—the kitchen, the bedrooms, the closets, the engine rooms. The tour is then topped off with memorabilia from the actual soldiers who once lived upon the magnificent vessel.

We are looking forward to another trip to Pittsburgh soon, possibly doing our first full family camping trip at Yogi Bear’s Jellystone Park and checking out Laurel Caverns. Wherever the road takes us, we will keep making memories and appreciating the moments with our LEO.

if you only knew

Earlier today as I sat down, I decided to do a quick scroll through Facebook and saw a picture of two girls in softball uniforms, at least one of them the daughter of a police officer, with some writing on the their arms that made me do a double take. Written on them were the last names of two local police officers who were shot and killed going to a 911 hang-up call just a few short months ago. They had written the names to honor those two families who would not be showering their fathers with hugs and gifts today for the first time. If they only knew that last year’s Father’s Day would be their last with their daddies…

My heart aches for those five children who lost their fathers and the two wives who lost their husbands on that day.

As I looked around at the decorations the boys stayed up late last night to hang, it made me treasure once again every moment we have together. The morbid thought did cross my mind as we ran streamer across the ceiling and blew up balloons that there was a chance my husband and their daddy would not be home in the morning to see all that they did.

Just the other day, while I was sitting around the table having dinner with my children and playing outside, my husband was in the middle of the woods for hours with four other officers looking for a man who fled after being pulled over for a simple traffic violation, presumed to be armed. I missed this call on the scanner and was not aware of this until the following morning, but it was one of those situations that make you ensure to cherish your marriage every single moment. If I only knew what situation my husband would be in that night…

The emotional toil of being an officer or being a loved one at home, waiting anxiously for that officer to walk through the door, could make a person crazy if they focus on what could go wrong. But instead we try to focus on what could go right, look at the difference our LEO has made and continues to make, and honor the fallen who made the ultimate sacrifice. Although really it’s their families that made the biggest sacrifice. If people only knew what an officer, a soldier, any first responder really, and their families go through on a daily basis…

Most importantly, we do our best to remember that no matter what happens, we’ll all be reunited someday in a place where there is no injury, no sickness, no criminals, and no death. Knowing that is best reassurance possible.

why fitness matters to me and should matter to you

As a mom of four, I drink more coffee than the “recommended allowance,” which means I’m hooked. Anything we can’t easily just give up, I would consider an addiction. Sometimes addiction can be good… like Orrin Woodward talks about being positively addicted to Christ, to the love of his wife, and other good things.

Now of course, even certain positive addictions can get out of hand. I remember Elizabeth George relaying a story in her book A Woman After God’s Own Heart about her husband walking in as she was preparing a wonderful meal for someone else as a ministry. When asked what they were having for dinner, the response was less than satisfactory. She was so busy serving others, she failed to serve her own family that day. Serving can feel good, and that feeling can become an addiction or an idol in our lives if we don’t keep it properly balanced with other priorities.

As far as fitness, I have seen moms who were “addicted” to fitness, or to looking good. I am no expert by any means in motherhood or in fitness, but I love both. Motherhood is a higher priority for me, but as a family, we all can make small sacrifices for each other. It all comes down to our motives. Sure, I want to look good especially for my husband, but I have a tendency to swell at compliments when someone notices the weight I’ve lost or the commitment to my exercise and nutrition program. And seeking those compliments can easily become an idol for me if I’m not constantly aware.

On a positive note, I believe being a “fit mom” sets an example for my family of truly treating my body as a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Having fitness goals also helps me apply 1 Corinthians 9:27 to my life: “I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” I know I rarely feel close to God after a midnight binge in the cupboard. Next time you feel guilty about taking time for yourself to exercise, remember the benefits for your husband, your children, and everyone else you serve, as well as your temple. Here’s to a happy, healthy life!

a few thoughts on blessings and time

Some things in life can not be explained. Why would God allow one person to make millions of dollars only to blow it on drugs and premarital relations, while another searches the garbage innocently to find a scrap of food? Why do I lay in the comfort and warmth of my own bed next to my wonderful husband while another woman hides in terror waiting upon the arrival of her abusive spouse? Why does a crack addict bare children with handicaps, beaten and scared with no stable person to care for them, while the barren woman desperately cries for months on end waiting for just the chance of carrying their own? And yet, the crackhead, the barren, the blessed–they were all fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and we are all COG POW’s (as learned from Pastor Carrie Antzcak): Children of God, People of Worth.

I love the saying “If you are blessed, be a blessing.” It is our job to discern how God calls us to be a blessing. As wives and mothers, it can be hard because those missions come first. It is all and well to volunteer at the church, serve the hungry, or reach out to the needy but not at the cost of neglect to our families.

We try to involve our kids in a variety of missions and volunteer work in hopes of some sort of compassion sticking in their hearts. I want them to look back on their childhoods and remember service being a priority. And by no means is our family perfect. In fact, some days, the ungratefulness of my kids and sometimes even my own heart makes me wonder if any of it is making any difference. But then I’ll have a chat with God and realize that’s just the devil trying to get in. They’ll remember serving at the community dinners, picking up litter in a hard neighborhood, or putting together tie blankets at a local Linus Project event.

Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it (even if he tries really really hard to do so mid-childhood and rebels against everything you’ve taught him) (Proverbs 22:6, parentheses added). God will reward your effort, in this world and in the next. But it’s all in His timing, and that’s the hardest part.

installs to outlaws

I never knew or truly appreciated what an officer had to go through to get to the position where he or she is currently serving. I did not realize how many people desire to become a peace officer either until I saw it first hand with my own husband. Some make it, and many don’t. My husband worked his behind off to be in the first group and his story is truly awe-inspiring.

I take you back about a year and a half ago, when my husband just had his ten-year anniversary working in an install bay, putting in car radios and remote start/security systems into an array of vehicles. He enjoyed the job for a long time, but it was getting old. And then came the breaking point…

In November 2017, my husband was diagnosed with a herniated disc with sciatica. Between his type of work and a corner-cutting chiropractor, he was left with back pain that sent a shooting sensation down his leg, causing him to walk hunched over with a limp and wake up in dire pain multiple times throughout the night for five months straight. He tried everything he could find to avoid surgery… visits to the neuromuscular massage therapy, getting stretched on an inversion table, at-home stretches and massages, physical therapy. To no avail. Finally we gave in to surgery in March 2018 and bam, he was cured.

This is when we decided God was calling us to something else. He even gave us a sign when we got to sit behind Chris Swanson on a plane ride home after a convention where we heard Chris speak. Chris is the undersheriff of Genesee County in Michigan, a motivational speaker, author, and a huge influencer for my husband to go into law enforcement. And it didn’t help that Chris shouted out to those around us that “This guy is going to police academy!” (or maybe it did).

After a couple months off to heal, my husband went back to installing to continue to provide for his family of six. But we knew what he was supposed to be doing. Only four months after surgery, he passed his first physical agility exam and began the process of interviewing for a peace officer position.

That’s when we knew it was game time. Thankfully we fell in with some amazing mentors when we were the ripe ole age of twenty, and were able to save enough money (and pay off a huge chunk of debt to decrease expenses) through their mentorship and the Financial Fitness principles taught by LIFE Leadership, and had enough in the savings account for my husband to take a sabbatical from work to attend police academy.

Meanwhile, all four kids only getting bigger and more expensive, we pressed on through the academy, trying to pinch pennies and still investing in our family as well as in the police interview process, which is not cheap either. These men and women have to pay for physical fitness tests, paper tests, and then invest time and gas money into background checks, panel interviews, chief interviews, and more. It is truly amazing what they go through to do what they are called to do.

Finally we were blessed with a conditional offer from a local department just prior to the completion of academy. About a month after graduation, my amazing husband passed the state test and was sworn in two days later. He has since done some amazing things on the job, even still in training. I could not be more proud of him, and could not appreciate law enforcement officers more after watching first hand what they do in order to serve and protect our communities. Give an officer a smile, a high five, or even a thumbs up today. Let them know you appreciate what they do!

making a leo family work

Having a full-time law enforcement hubby can be tricky to juggle schedules, frustrating when he is gone for twelve hours straight four to five days in a row because the training happened to fall in his long week, and at times downright stressful. But we have to remember why they do what they do, and why we do what we do. If you are like me, you have been called to be a wife and a mother first and foremost. Being a LEOW is a special role to play. There are some things I believe we can do to help make life a little better, and our families a little stronger. Twenty years from now, when I am reflecting on the days of having four young kiddos in the house, this is what I will remember doing to make our LEO family work…

1. Family Trips. Before my husband began his on-the-road training, we agreed to take at least one overnight family trip every quarter. These trips have been the best memories! Normally we keep them within two hours away, which will probably increase as the youngest grows out of toddlerhood. Planning involves finding the ideal “short week” to travel within and deciding which museum to visit. I am blessed to receive a membership to our local natural history museum from a family member every year for my birthday. Because this museum is ASTC-certified (Association of Science-Technology Centers), we qualify for the Travel Passport Program which allows free admission to multiple science centers and museums in just about every state as long as it is outside of a ninety-mile radius. There are at least five qualifying places within two hours which make for a wonderful quick overnight stint and some awesome experiences. Even if we didn’t receive the membership as a gift, it would be well worth the money, especially with four kids!

2. Date nights. My husband and I agreed to make sure we do at least one date night each month. This has been a variety of things, depending on the budget and expenses for the month or what events are happening. We are both UFC fans, so a few times a year we’ll go grab a drink and watch the fight at our favorite local bar (thankfully we don’t live in the same city as his department or he might see some familiar faces he previously cuffed or cited). Depending on what’s playing, we’ll go take advantage of “Customer Appreciation Day” at the local theater (since our “weekend” is often on a Monday and Tuesday). Sometimes we just need to mellow out so we’ll pick a night to watch a movie together on the couch, pour a glass of wine and call it an “At-Home Date Night.” Being that we don’t subscribe to cable, and aside from an occasional “Live PD” or “Officer 401” video on YouTube, we don’t really watch television so Movie Night is a treat (you know, a flick that is not animated). You just have to find your niche, and as wives, we usually get to pick where we go or what we do… make sure to do something in his world once in a while even if he doesn’t necessarily ask for it.

3. Date days. We also make sure to date our kiddos once a month. Each child (except for the two-year-old; he has another year or two) gets to pick what he does or where he goes for a date day, within a $10-$20 budget and a half-hour drive. We try to alternate who goes with which parent each month also. Date days are to make sure nobody gets lost in the mix; they all get that one-on-one attention during their special time out. And it’s always fun to get a break from the daily routine of caring for four youngin’s.

4. Family nights. Just before our oldest turned three, he fell from a tall kitchen chair and broke his femur. Having an eight-month-old baby as well as the two year-old in a full leg cast led to a lot of movies being watched. From this came the tradition of Movie Night which ended up falling on Fridays. Once the oldest started school, Movie Night was highly sought after as a time to just chill out and cuddle with everyone. Eventually Cleaning Party* was added in, making Friday evening a time to “work hard and play hard” together. Movie Night was exchanged for Game Night upon participation in Screen-Free Week with our church group and ended up being so much fun that we now alternate. No matter the activity, Family Night is a time set aside for us to make sure we are catching up and having some fun in the simplicity of our home.

5. Overnight trips. My favorite! At least once a year, just the hubby and I go off somewhere overnight. I’m sure once the kids are older we’ll be doing this much more often, but for now, we don’t want them to overstay their welcome at the grandparents’ house. We usually stay within a couple of hours away and somewhere simple, but it is wonderful to get that time with just us. After all, you’ll be living with your husband a lot longer than you will be living with your children. Make sure you to be reminded what it’s like to be with just him again! And it usually means someone else is cooking–yea!

These are five things we have made sure to do to make our family work even before my husband became a LEO. We’ve had to revamp some things, but it still works even with shift work! By no means are we a perfect family—we are far from it! But twenty years from now, I know I will have no regrets in making these five things a habit, and I know our family is better because of them.

*Cleaning Party- a weekly time on a set night when each child picks a chore from a hat (they now work on rotation), Disney music is blared, and the floors and bathrooms get scrubbed/vacuumed, followed by a half cup of pop (since pop is only allowed at “parties,” this makes it a special treat).

stressed-out mama

You have four wonderfully handsome, strong, witty young men and a hard-working hubby. You have a roof over your head. You’re not living with the fear of your power being shut off or your stomach not being filled. You get to be at home or swim lessons or the coolest library program. In fact, it’s your choice of where you go and what you put into your schedule. So why is life so stressful? (This is me talking to myself, and you if you’re like me.)

Financial peer pressure. I believe peer pressure is just as tough as an adult. Us “mature ones” just don’t like to admit it. It can be hard to watch as your neighbor gets a new car, even if you know they don’t actually “own” it and will be lucky to have paid it off by the time they crash it or it breaks down. Frugality can be a tough principle to follow, and it is most definitely against the status quo.
Fear of the unknown. It is so hard to always know if what I am doing today will be the best choice for my children when their time comes to go out into the world. Finding the right balance of teaching responsibility while allowing them to be kids can be a tough gig, and then you throw in your own emotions, fatigue, goals, you name it.
Fear of guilt or blame. It can be so hard to deal with the harsh words that can come from the very mouths we have raised. Especially with pop psychology shouting at us over any sort of discipline and how it will hurt their self-esteem. I wonder if mothers from decades past worried about things like self-esteem, or if they just didn’t have so many different opinions thrown at them from all directions and less time to write about it!
Regret. Regret can be one of the worse pills to swallow. Whether it be from harsh words spoken or just a subtle disbelief in someone like your own kid or husband. And regret on the deathbed, I’m sure is the worst of all. I love what Chris Brady says: “There is a too late.”
Anger or bitterness towards our own upbringing. My, oh my, how the pendulum swings. Can’t the stinking thing just stay in the middle so us moms can have some sanity? I’ve heard my own mother say how she wanted to give us what she never had growing up, which I get. It seems sometimes we can get so caught up, or at least I have, in what I did not “get” (and I’m not talking about stuff, I got plenty of that) while growing up that we can become obsessed or at the very least well overdo whatever it is we feel was missing from our childhood. One example for me is feeling that certain TV shows were more important than what was on my mind, so it was very easy to limit screen time in my home, and not subscribe to cable or any other media provider, so as to not get sucked into this with my own kids. On the flip side, who knows if one day one of my children will choose to watch hours of television a day just because of they were not allowed to do so growing up?!

So how do we find peace of mind among the pile of dishes, toddlers pulling at our legs, or tweens begging for attention and doing really obnoxious things to get it? I believe it, of course, always goes back to God. He’s the maker of peace, and they are His children anyways. We are to be good stewards. Keeping priorities in line helps also. Living up to our own standards and what God wants for our lives, and doing our best to ignore the standards the world gives us will allow for a life of no regrets. If you have been blessed with crazy kids, then do your best to embrace it. Make sure they are respectful, but find ways to let them be crazy. I’m obviously talking to myself. That’s really why I love writing so much, and if I can help one other crazy family by sharing what we do or just knowing that they are not the only one out there, then it’s worth it.

10 things a mom has in common with a cop

With Mother’s Day kicking off National Police Week, my mind wandered to the similarities between the two professions. By no means do I wish to diminish the honor of these amazing heroes, especially this week memorializing the ultimate sacrifice. However, it is important to add a little humor to our lives. That being said, these phrases are from actual job descriptions of peace officer positions.

10. Work normally consists of routine patrol. Routine makes it all run smoothly, if you can actually stay on it.

9. Performs administrative support tasks. Every incident needs a detailed report, of course (even if it is the same information you just gave the doctor, the school, and the Scout master).

8. Issues summons, citations, and warnings. ALL THE TIME. (Summons refered to Judge Daddy.)

7. Enforces laws and maintains public order… although I’m not so sure how much “order” is involved on most days on this end.

6. Conducts investigations… often times listening to both sides give excuses and justifications for why it is not his fault.

5. Handles high-risk tactical operations. This is what I would consider grocery shopping with four kids.

4. Responds to public safety calls (also known as tattling).

3. Handles hazardous devices/substances. No details necessary.

2. Interacts with a culturally and socially diverse population. The general public can either be for us or against us, and can be quick to give backlash upon the hint of one wrong move, often times with the false accusation of unjust motives (even if they have been created by the same two people, raised in the same household).

1. Loves unconditionally. Okay, this one is not from a department job description… but it does come from the supreme job description. The ultimate form of love—John 15:13.

If only motherhood had a mandatory academy and certification prior to giving birth…

*John 15:13 “Greater has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”

backing the blue while cleaning the poo

Yes, this is my first official blog. No, this is not my first rodeo. Mother’s Day is coming quickly upon us and this blog is to celebrate the mamas out there, especially you Law Enforcement wives and moms out there.

Let me introduce myself… my name is Mary. I am the proud and crazy mother of four wonderfully “all boy” young males, a home-school teacher, a runner, and a rookie law enforcement wife, as well as many other things depending on the day. My husband was just sworn in four months ago, and already I have seen the amazing community in this profession.

But I also know there may be some ladies out there who are burnt out and may have grown weary to the position in which they have been blessed. Galatians 6:9 says not to get tired and give up for we will reap a harvest of blessing in due time. I want you to know you are amazing, and what you do matters. Those men could not do their jobs if they did not have you to pack their lunch (or dinner or breakfast), to keep their uniforms clean, to come home to every day or night, and yes, to keep the diapers clean on our future law enforcement officers.

So whether it’s physically with your LEO or listening to him on the scanner, I hope everyone one of you are able to enjoy your Mother’s Day and remember you are loved and appreciated!