stressed-out mama – four crazies and a cop

You have four wonderfully handsome, strong, witty young men and a hard-working hubby. You have a roof over your head. You’re not living with the fear of your power being shut off or your stomach not being filled. You get to be at home or swim lessons or the coolest library program. In fact, it’s your choice of where you go and what you put into your schedule. So why is life so stressful? (This is me talking to myself, and you if you’re like me.)

Financial peer pressure. I believe peer pressure is just as tough as an adult. Us “mature ones” just don’t like to admit it. It can be hard to watch as your neighbor gets a new car, even if you know they don’t actually “own” it and will be lucky to have paid it off by the time they crash it or it breaks down. Frugality can be a tough principle to follow, and it is most definitely against the status quo.
Fear of the unknown. It is so hard to always know if what I am doing today will be the best choice for my children when their time comes to go out into the world. Finding the right balance of teaching responsibility while allowing them to be kids can be a tough gig, and then you throw in your own emotions, fatigue, goals, you name it.
Fear of guilt or blame. It can be so hard to deal with the harsh words that can come from the very mouths we have raised. Especially with pop psychology shouting at us over any sort of discipline and how it will hurt their self-esteem. I wonder if mothers from decades past worried about things like self-esteem, or if they just didn’t have so many different opinions thrown at them from all directions and less time to write about it!
Regret. Regret can be one of the worse pills to swallow. Whether it be from harsh words spoken or just a subtle disbelief in someone like your own kid or husband. And regret on the deathbed, I’m sure is the worst of all. I love what Chris Brady says: “There is a too late.”
Anger or bitterness towards our own upbringing. My, oh my, how the pendulum swings. Can’t the stinking thing just stay in the middle so us moms can have some sanity? I’ve heard my own mother say how she wanted to give us what she never had growing up, which I get. It seems sometimes we can get so caught up, or at least I have, in what I did not “get” (and I’m not talking about stuff, I got plenty of that) while growing up that we can become obsessed or at the very least well overdo whatever it is we feel was missing from our childhood. One example for me is feeling that certain TV shows were more important than what was on my mind, so it was very easy to limit screen time in my home, and not subscribe to cable or any other media provider, so as to not get sucked into this with my own kids. On the flip side, who knows if one day one of my children will choose to watch hours of television a day just because of they were not allowed to do so growing up?!

So how do we find peace of mind among the pile of dishes, toddlers pulling at our legs, or tweens begging for attention and doing really obnoxious things to get it? I believe it, of course, always goes back to God. He’s the maker of peace, and they are His children anyways. We are to be good stewards. Keeping priorities in line helps also. Living up to our own standards and what God wants for our lives, and doing our best to ignore the standards the world gives us will allow for a life of no regrets. If you have been blessed with crazy kids, then do your best to embrace it. Make sure they are respectful, but find ways to let them be crazy. I’m obviously talking to myself. That’s really why I love writing so much, and if I can help one other crazy family by sharing what we do or just knowing that they are not the only one out there, then it’s worth it.

Author: Blue Moose

Blue Moose is the wife of an officer, mama of four, a runner, a writer, a homeschool teacher and a child of God. View all posts by Blue Moose